My name is Bessie Beetle and I have a tale to tell.
You see, I have two children and their upkeep can be … well!
Jessie can’t stop jumping even though she’s only three.
And Bella is allergic to each word that starts with B.
We called in Super Nanny. ‘Can you come and take a look?’
‘Cor blimey, blue, bazooka’s I had better get my book,’
said Nanny in the kitchen as dear Jessie bounced on by.
To which my darling Bella toppled over with a cry.
‘Don’t say B,’ I whispered, lifting Bella from the floor.
Nanny stood there frowning while our Jessie bounced some more.
At breakfast Bella lost it when the nanny said, ‘Brown bread.’
At lunchtime Jessie fainted when she leaped and bumped her head.
At teatime Nanny fainted, when our Jessie jumped so high,
that plaster from the ceiling hit poor Nanny in the eye.
‘Blooming brown begonias!’ howled poor Nanny from the floor.
Bella promptly stumbled, smacking Nanny in the jaw.
‘That’s it!’ the Nanny shouted. ‘I am off to lie in bed.’
Which startled our poor Bella who then kneed her in the head.
Screeching like a banshee, Nanny legged it for the train,
Leaped into the carriage and was never seen again.